Sunday, October 19, 2008

Letting go of pride

We found out that G is a candidate for a CI in his left ear. We obviously wanted one enough to ask about it and take him to be evaluated. But even finding out that he could have one, it was hard to decide if we wanted one. I had built up this image of myself as a good parent. Part of that identity was my acceptance of G's deafness and accommodating it by learning sign language. Getting a CI felt like a betrayal of that ideal.

But we want one. We want him to have a better chance of getting intelligible speech. Maybe this is naive, but we want to devote less effort to speech. Right now he just doesn't have access to most speech frequencies. With a CI, maybe the same amount of speech will have greater effect.

And we still use sign language all the time. So we have to let go of that pride. That's probably a good thing.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


Today we found out the verdict from the implant team. Wow. Heavy. G is eligible to have an implant in his left ear. This is so huge. I can't wrap my mind around what that means to have a decision of eligibility from the people that actually decide this. We had heard stories of people with more hearing getting a CI. Because G has a sloping loss, it is hard to say what his hearing loss is.

But now we have the go from the implant team and they are submitting the insurance paperwork.

I'm somewhere between shouting it from the rooftops and keeping it a secret. What now, indeed.

Friday, October 10, 2008


I wanted to make jam, and like always, I realized I didn't have quite enough sugar.  Rather than go to the store I asked G to calculate ...